Why do you run?

I had already told you that I got hurt running for the first time this year and I wasn’t sure whether or not I would run again this summer.

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Well, like every year I think, all I needed was a couple of lovely sunny and warm evenings to make me want to lace up and run. I don’t think running is the sport for me and I don’t enjoy training for a race. But I do love going for a run on a nice day.

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I mean, when Fred looks up at me with his best sad puppy eyes before running around the house I can’t resist taking out for a walk. And if I’m going to walk why not run?

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I am pleased to say that swapping shoes for my (well-used) older pair has improved my knee situation 100%. So if running hurts, check out your shoes.

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And like every time I go for a walk or a run (in this case a run / walk / stop to put the dog on a leash when coming across people) I can’t help but think we are so lucky to live where we do. Those mountains are so inspiring.

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And just because I love training with my KB so much, a little sweaty gif for you😛

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So, why do you run? Or why don’t you?

Planning the garden

When we fist got our gardening boxes 2 years ago I planted a bunch of stuff and hoped for the best! That first year we had a few fails (my parsnips never came out) but we also had a huge amount of fresh veggies. The second year I discovered the joys of dealing with parasites but once again we had a ton of veggies.

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The jungle

I was so impatient to start this year that I turned to technology to decide on what to plant where. I have a little journal where I wrote what worked, but I was excited to start planning properly…

Garden plan (1)

 

I  was excited to see that my parsley, mint, oregano, thyme and one Swiss chard survived winter and are already producing! The kale and spinach I planted under the window are thriving so I moved it to a different bed. It is now protecting my beans and my arugula against the frosty mornings. I’m so happy with how well it’s working!

And I can’t wait to see the rest of the veggies come out! I planted my carrots, beetroot, turnips, salad and radishes yesterday. My courgettes, cucumbers, squash and tomatoes are nicely growing inside.

Something else to look forward to this summer!

May

I say it every month, but time flies! I can’t believe it’s May already and Spring is in full swing.

As usual I wanted to set myself some goals…

In April I wanted to:

  • Lose some of that weight for good! Didn’t really happen😦 Despite my best efforts, I lost 5oogms
  • Keep the house tidy and clean at all time now that I’ve started a deep Spring clean I could have done better but we’ve been doing well on that front with the Scotsman
  • Work on the garden, keep it up The garden is doing awesome. More to come on the subject but I’m eating veggies from it already

In May I want to:

  • Eat more proteins! I’ll have to write a recap about my appointment with the nutritionist… But she gave me some ideas on I am really motivated to eat more proteins and nearly no grains. I’ve already been doing it for 10 days:)
  • Workouts: I’m still going to continue with the Tone it up challenge. And I’ll keep focusing on building strength with their workouts and work on flexibility and balance with regular yoga.
  • Wardrobe: Time for an inventory of my clothes! I’m trying to save money and pay off debt (still) so I want to make sure I only buy things “I need” rather than just fill up my wardrobe
  • Fertility:  Thank you for your support on my last post. There are days where I obsess about it and others like today when it’s no big deal… But I am thinking of trying a new treatment this month and am hoping more proteins will help too.

What do you have planned for May?

FF: The woman I didn’t want to become

It all started 4 years ago. I woke up one day and there it was, an inescapable desire for a baby to call my own.

Until then, scarred by my childhood I thought it wasn’t for me. But somehow having a puppy made me realize that I was capable of love and care. And my body decided to wake up.

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I always thought the biological clock was something made up by Hollywood romantic comedies. Let me tell you, it’s real!

I stopped the pill and told the Scotsman that if he didn’t want a baby he’d have to take care of the contraception. He got angry, he wasn’t ready. But he didn’t do anything about it.

After a few cycles, things started to go wonky. Fast forward a year without periods, and I was diagnosed with PCOS, a hormonal disorder that means I don’t ovulate. Great!

 

Turns out there is a treatment that will help. Hopeful, I take it. The Scotsman still doesn’t change anything.

I got a cycle back and feel 100% better with the treatment I’m on, but still no ovulation, so no chance of getting pregnant.

And that desire for a baby just keeps on growing. I had told myself I wouldn’t become one of these women obsessed with fertility and their uterus but here I am, obsessing.

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I’m 31, 31 is young you say. Well my doctor just gave me Clomid (to stimulate ovulation). If the first cycle doesn’t work, the Scotsman would need to do some exams too (he refused).

Then we try it for 6 months. If it doesn’t work, it means more tests. Then if that doesn’t help, the fertility clinic. Which would mean a fertility treatment in 2/3 years. Meaning I would be closer to 35. Meaning doctor thinks I need to try NOW so I can either have a baby or start on the heavy stuff before I’m 35.

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I can’t help but feel like sh*t is getting real. Like it’s all spinning around me and I need to act. NOW.

Except. Well except the man in my life is not ready. Or maybe he doesn’t want kids at all. Maybe in 5 years. Yes he wants kids but financially it’s too much right now.

Except he keeps on changing his story and I feel like I’m on a merry-go-round.

And I never expected to feel this way but I’m afraid I’m at the point when I might have to leave the man I love, my family, to find someone else to have babies with.

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Because either he is on board with this whole thing or he isn’t. Given the circumstances we need to act now. And if he’s not there to support me and he doesn’t want a family, I don’t have long to rebuild everything.

Nothing is more scary to me, I don’t want to start over. But I know that if I stay, and we don’t do everything in our power to make it work I will regret it for the rest of my life.

Me, the girl who didn’t want kids and didn’t understand the urge. I am now ready to up-heave everything in my life because my ovaries told me too.

I had planned on showing you a cute spring dress, and telling you that if I need foundation I should go with the color of the wall behind me.

But since my blog audience is small but kind, I get to get it off my chest. I get to write it down and make it real.

Thanks for reading

 

 

I have a plan

I met with the dietitian last week and will receive a meal plan this week-end. I’ll let you know more about it once I get the actual meal plan. But she did confirm what I already know, I need to focus on protein and good fats to fight my hormonal condition. I’ve tried and failed before but I am putting every chance in my corner this time and making veggies and proteins the stars of every meal.

In the last 2/3 months I have been able to get into a rhythm with my workouts again since all my back troubles are gone. I wanted to do the Tone it up program last year but missed the boat so I thought I would give it a try. And when I saw Tianna was doing it too it encouraged me further. But, I don’t thing the actual weekly program will work for me since a lot of it involved cardio plus strength on any given day. And since I do most of my cardio outside the house (swimming, running, hiking) and my strength training at home (as opposed to the gym) I decided to modify the program.

I will try to do the daily moves every morning, or after work. And since I am working on my flexibility I will incorporate more yoga. The plan is therefore to do 2 cardio session a week (a shorter one during the week and a long one at the week-end) in addition to biking to work (it’s cardio). I will also do strength training by combining 2 Tone it up workouts twice a week. And finally I want to do 2 yoga sessions a week.

Since I’m averaging 5 workouts a week at the moment it should be OK. And I’m living myself the option to switch things around if I fancy rowing and yoga or strength training on the same night.

The goal is to drop those pesky 3kgs, to alleviate my hormonal symptoms with the higher in protein diet, to fit in my skinniest jeans again and to feel confident in a bikini this summer.

Another goal of mine is to tone up more. I think part of the problem is the lack of protein in my diet. I am happy to see some definition in my legs, and I do have some muscle ton in my arms. But I was recently talking to a friend of a friend. We were talking about exercise and she looked surprise when I told her I work out frequently. I DON’T WANT PEOPLE TO LOOK SURPRISED WHEN I TELL THEM I EXERCISE.

I started with cardio yesterday and am looking forward to doing the two routines below tonight:)

Do you have a plan to get in shape for summer / in general or are you happy with your current routine / you don’t care?

FF: Feeling hot

I don’t know about you but some days I feel frumpy / fat etc. and some days I feel pretty hot and on top of the world. It’s obviously very subjective and it sometimes even varies during the course of the same day!

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I don’t know why but somehow the combination of my leopard shoes and my stripes top with a knot made me feel pretty hot. I love these shoes, the heel is the perfect height and since I purchased them 3 years ago I have looked forward to pulling them out in the spring and autumn.

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And since it was a nice day I decided to bike into “town” and get myself some sushi for lunch.

I don’t know about you but biking with my hair in the wind on a nice day puts me in a really good mood and makes me feel pretty confident.

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So here I am, confidently walking around, noticing a couple of people looking at me. I’m thinking it’s because of my awesome sexy shoes and the noise the heels make. After all, not a lot of ladies wear heels around it.

All of a sudden I see an acquaintance. I say hi and smile. She looks at me and says: “your zip is down”. Dam

! Down goes my confidence.

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Not to be defeated, after work I bike to the Scotsman’s work to say hello. I get off my bike, something doesn’t feel quite right.

I go in, chat with him, thinking he’ll be blown away by my sexy shoes. I chat with his coworkers but something doesn’t feel right, my right foot seems to be wobbly.

I get home, pull in the driveway on my bike, put my foot down, and my heel breaks!

Good by leopard shoes. It was a good life we had together. At least I still have the pictures:)

What’s your favorite pair of shoes?

In writing

As you may remember I have been complaining about gaining a little bit of weight lately and not being able to lose it..

As it happens, I went to a women’s day event locally last month and there was a silent auction. I attended a talk by a nutritionist about holistic nutrition and emotional eating. At the end of it I bid on a session with her and long and behold I won! I had only bid half of what she charges so it was unexpected! Oh well, my contribution will be donated towards a scholarship for local girls.

I finally took the plunge nad she is meeting me tomorrow. With my PCOS, it is recommended that I eat a low Glycemic Index (GI) diet rich in protein. And since I am more of a carbs fan (healthy whole grains mind you) I thought it would be good to have someone take a look at my diet.

Before meeting her, I had to record everything I eat over a week. I was a little nervous since it was reminiscent of my eating disorder days but it went well. And it helped me see what I REALLY eat.

Granted, it happened during a “hormonal” week when I had all sorts of cravings. But writing down “40gms of chocolate” as a snack, or “small portion of fries” from drive through made it more real. It made me realize that while most of my meals are indeed pretty healthy, I give in to those cravings more often that I thought. And it also made me think about what I was actually eating.

It’s sometimes easier to just eat whatever is in the fridge rather than cooking after work. And writing it down made me get in gear and prep some food for my diners.

I’ll let you know how my appointment goes, but in the mean time I’m glad I did this little tracking exercise. As a matter of fact I think I will keep it going for a few more weeks.

Have you ever met with a dietitian?

Photo bomber

It’s not my fault, he comes with us every where. I think I might even see him more than the Scotsman. In fact I’m pretty sure I do! So Fred end up being in every picture I take lol

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Like on Sunday when we took advantage of the wonderful weather to go for a hike and picnic by some lakes with my girlfriends. The water was incredibly clear and the colors amazing!

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It’s funny. I used to loath nature and love the city, but as I grew older wiser, I realized how much nature has to offer. Study after study has shown the calming effects of nature on the brain and I can attest that there is nothing like a good hike in wonderful scenery to reduce stress.

Now, bring on summer so us humans can go for a swim too!

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Did you get up to anything fun this week-end?

 

Mellow yello

I don’t know if it’s the grey sky behind me, or the fact that I had just ridden my bike home but I feel like my skin looks so dull on these pictures. Makes me want to reach for foundation and concealer ha. Note how the volume in my hair seems unaffected by wearing a helmet…. Safety first

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I’m so excited not to have to wear a big coat anymore since it means I can renew my love affair with blazers. I do think that they bring a nice “professional” vibe to jeans or summer dresses.

I mean, I could show up to work in jeans and a fleece, but I like to look more polished.

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And while I know that a bright yellow blazer screams more 80’s than 90’s, I’m not ready for my tween / early teen years fashion to make a comeback. So I’m kinda pretending it’s not happening until I’m ready to rock deep brown lipstick again😉

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As usual the blazer and the jeans are second-hand. The jeans are from Gap (model 1969) and I scored them for $5 at the salvation army! So happy with my find.

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As for Fred, while he came to see me as soon as I stepped out of the house with my camera he soon went back to his bone. You should see it, it’s the size of my harm. He actually got it by jumping through the trees you see on the right, over the chain link fence and the other side and stealing it from the neighbors’ dog! Cheeky bugger!

When we bought the house we thought for sure with the fence on one side and the trees plus the fence on the other side he’s be contained. Not quite, the little escape artists knows how to get out when he wants to haha

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I know yellow can be a tricky color to pull off, but it’s all about finding the shade that suits your skin tone, even though I find it usually looks best on darker skin tones.

Do you like yellow? If you have a dog, does he / she ever escape for a little wonder?

Natural beauty routine: the morning

I feel like I deserted this little blog lately. Mainly because I have also been blogging in French here. And sometimes I don’t want to write the same thing twice or I write about things I’ve already written here.

Generally though, even if I write about the same thing and use the same pictures (like today) it ends up coming out differently in French and in English.

As you probably know by now I have an interest in all things green and I have been using natural products on my skin as much as possible. I thought I would share my morning routine with you today.

I’m lucky since despite my PCOS (which causes breakouts) my skin is mostly clear. I had a phase with a lot of breakouts last year (remember?) and started layering with “conventional” Asian cosmetics. While it worked and my skin improved I knew I wanted a more natural approach again.

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Step 1:

I start by spraying my face and chest with rose floral water and blue cornflower water on my eyes. It wakes up and energizes my face. There are so many floral waters for every skin concern, they really are awesome. I bought these in France but I will be ordering some once I finish the bottle.

Step 2:

I then use a serum for my face and chest as well as an eye cream. I like this eye cream from Lanoline, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to find it again. It’s so light I can apply a thick layer, like a little eye mask every morning. I’m currently using the manuka honey face serum in the green box but I’m not the biggest fan. I however loved the rainwater botanicals sent by 

27 Things I Learned in 27 Years

. I think I will buy it again for the few days a months I get imperfections.

 

Step 3:

Moisturizer! I’m currently using a moisturizer sent by Tianna as well. And while I like it it’s not ideal for my skin and the price is too high for me. So I’m on the market. Again, I have an idea of what to get, but I am also on the lookout for a natural moisturizer with an integrated spf…

Step 4:

I’m still trying to find the perfect natural deodorant. I like this one from kiss my face, and seems pretty efficient even when I bike to work. But it’s pretty liquid, so I have to put it on ages before I put my top on. Also, the lavender smell is pretty strong through the day.

What does your morning routine look like? Are you careful about using natural products?